Stones & Crystals: How to Choose the “Right” Stones For You

This little tree agate gave me so much grief... That's how I learned how to choose stones with the right energies.

This little tree agate gave me so much grief… That’s how I learned how to choose stones with the right energies.

For most of my time collecting stones, rocks, and crystals I have had no problem instinctively choosing the right stones. You could say that they literally chose me through their twinkling and their soft energy. But what happens if you pick the “wrong” stone? Is there such a thing?

From my experience, when dealing with energy (and stones contain a lot of energy) there is going to be energy incompatible with yours. Whether it is in a relationship, a co-worker or boss relationship, or general people /animal interactions, it is easier to tell when the energy just doesn’t mix or fit well. Stones work the same way, except sometimes they have a fickle way of telling you.

I picked up and bought the tree agate shown above. I felt like it was crying out for a home of some sort. I would play with it and absorb the energy. It was cut like a worry stone [with an indention in the middle for rubbing your thumb against it] so it was easy to handle. However, I started noticing subtle changes in my thought patterns when I held it.  Just so you know, I bought it November 1st, the Day of the Dead.

Everything in my life was going slightly haywire. I was angry and paranoid for very little reason. Every time I felt like this, I rubbed the worry stone. Essentially, the cycle was never ending until I had an experience I can’t quite explain.

Every time I looked at that stone, I saw two skulls with faces in them; they were MEAN and DARK faces. I took a picture of it to show people and none of them saw it but me. Well, I was home alone about to leave my house when I had this OVERWHELMING paranoia come over me. “You left the stove on and you are going to burn your house down.” This was my thought constantly. But I fought back. “I never even turned on the stove today!” It didn’t matter. All I could think about was I couldn’t leave my house because the stove was going to catch on fire. I went back in my house, felt the stove several times. It was cool as a cucumber. I felt absolutely nuts.

I left the house again to head to my appointment when the paranoia just got louder and louder. I decided I wouldn’t let this little stone get the best of me, so I contained it, and attempted to cleanse it. It would not cleanse. It wouldn’t do anything but laugh at me.

So I gave it to my friend.

Before you say “OMG Praktical! You are a HORRIBLE friend for giving them a cursed stone!”

Wrong. It just wasn’t meant for me. It was explained to me after I had a reiki session to see if that thing really was affecting me that the Day of the Dead is a huge energy and ancestor release day. Energy and ancestors can cling to any objects and take them over. My friend has since enjoyed that stone, she hasn’t seen any skulls in it, and she has used it with no issues or paranoia.

Usually, choosing the right stone is much simpler.  It isn’t the right color tone that dilates your pupils. It doesn’t feel like you want it to feel. It falls out of your hand a lot. You don’t feel that initial “Ahhhh” feeling you get when you hold the right one.

I got another tree agate that has brought nothing but happiness and grounding. That one was meant for me.

So, here’s a useful checklist of questions if you can’t decide whether or not a stone is right for you:

1. How does this stone make me feel? Is it comforting and happy? Does it make me smile?

2. Is it in my budget? [If you buy them] Is it a lucky find?

3. Did you trip over it or have it find some way to stand out and grab your attention? Did it seem to match the energy problem that you needed [if you were seeking a stone for energy blockages]?

4. Does it seem to have a message for you? [I am audio-clairvoyant so I hear things all the time.] Do you get that message even when holding it for a few minutes?


Most people KNOW when a stone is right for them, even if they have no training. My boyfriend purchased a hunk of snowflake obsidian after he couldn’t put it down after playing with it. It makes him really happy to play with it and look at it.

That’s the perfect fit right there.


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